Chapter 1: Don't sweat the small stuff
Chapter 1 Question: What is one example of "small stuff" that you let get to you recently?
In life we tend to worry or stress out about things that we don't really need to overthink or worry too much about. At least as for me I let the small stuff get the best of me. I was really worried for a test and let it get the best of me. I studied so hard and still thought I was going to fail. When in reality it was easier then expected. When your a perfectionist you want to succeed and do the best you can. I mean who doesn't want to do the best they can? But the thing is it's okay to fail. Use failure as inspiration to do better than you did before. When you sweat the small stuff you overthink, stress, and get wrapped up in this mindset that you have to sweat the small stuff. You don't!
Chapter 2: Make Peace With Imperfection
Chapter 2 Question: How does your ego affect your self esteem/How do emotions affect your self esteem? l.e judgment, fear, anxiety, depression, comparison, hatred, anger, and more.
Have you ever let your emotions or ego get the best of you? Have you ever felt not good enough, or compared yourself to others, or get angry when you don't accomplish what you wanted, or your scared of what people are going to think of you? I have. Letting your emotions get to you can be a really hard thing. I like pleasing everyone before myself. When I feel like i'm not doing good enough I get down on myself and it affects not only my mindset, but my actions as well. Sometimes I don't understand that its okay to not do everything perfect. It's okay to not please everyone or have everything turn out the way you wanted it to. "Make Peace With Imperfection". No one is perfect, and everyone makes mistakes. That's the part of life. Be okay to not be perfect. Don't expect to be perfect either.
Chapter 3: Let Go Of The Idea That Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Super Achievers
Chapter 3 Question: : "When you have what you want (inner peace) you are less distracted by your wants, needs, desires, and concerns. It's thus easier to concentrate, focus, achieve your goals, and to give back to others".
I feel like this quote means when you come to peace with yourself you're less distracted by everything you usually stress about. Instead of always worrying and overworking try to focus on the good, and not stress about your situations too much. I feel like I tend to overwork, overthink, and stress myself out way more than I should. There's a difference between working hard and stressing yourself out. I feel like most people always focus on what we want and what we don't have when we should focus on the goals we do have, and the things we can have if we have the right mindset towards everything. If you focus on achieving the goals you have set for yourself, and if you focus on the good you are less likely to focus on what you don't have.
Chapter 4: Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking
Chapter 4 Question: Do you notice how your body and mind feel when your thinking is out of control?
Thinking can get the best of you. I overthink everything. I tend to get all worked up in my own head, sometimes get mad at myself, or cry. When I overthink I get stressed and feel this heavy weight on my shoulders. I feel like I put too much pressure on myself sometimes and I try to do the best I can and when I'm not my thinking gets the best of me. When you overthink you tend to stress more. Stress is a very difficult feeling. You just keep thinking of everything you need to get done, or everything you haven't done yet and your head starts to ache, or your back starts to hurt, and you can't focus. There's so many things you notice about how your mind and body are feeling once you sit down and think about it. I notice when I don't let my thinking get out of control and when I try to just not worry so much I feel calm, I feel less stressed, and I feel like I'm more positive about things. When your thinking gets out of control it can be a big struggle. Physically and Mentally. When you try to not let your thinking get in the way you not only feel better, you feel like this weight has been taken off of your shoulders.
Chapter 5: Develop Your Compassion
Chapter 5 Question: Can you recall a time when you made something "big" and dramatic when in reality it was "small" and not that big of a deal?
I tend to see myself always making something a bigger deal than it really was. I get worked up about something and start to overthink it and make it a big deal. In the moment you think it's an awful situation and then once it's over with you look back on it and you think to yourself why did I make that a bigger deal than I needed to make it. Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing a good job with anything, or I overthink everything I do and I freak out. If we stop and think about the situation we are in and if we try to look at it from a different perspective, maybe we will realize the "big things" are actually small.
Chapter 6: Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your "In Basket" Won't Be Empty.
Chapter 6 Question: What does your "In Basket" look like? And will it be there tomorrow?
My in-basket is filled with homework, trying to gain confidence, work my hardest for everything that needs to be done, try to help everyone who needs me, try to become more healthier, clean my room, focusing on the good, not so much the bad, and trying to stay positive and motivated. My in-basket isn't really lots of things for me to stress about. I try to learn how to let go sometimes and just have fun. There's always going to be things that need to get done or things you have to do. That's why there's time management. If you can balance your to do's and trying to have fun you won't have to worry about what's in your basket. You just need to find out a time where to do it! In life you get to decide how you want to live it. Do you want to worry and stress about everything all the time? No! You want to have fun and enjoy life because life is way too short.
Chapter 7: Don't Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences.
Chapter 7 Question: Do you believe you are a strong listener or could you use some work?
I feel like I'm a very good listener. Whenever someone needs to talk or someone needs to tell me something I can be a really good listener. Most people tell me I'm the friend that they can always go to because I listen. Sometimes all people need is for someone to listen to them. Once you get older listening can be very important, and for some people they can see it as a very good trait. Some people nowadays can be very selfish and self conceited. When you find a friend that listens to you and your problems it makes you feel good. And being a good listener can be very good. Not just listening to people's problems but also listening to what your parents, teachers, mentors, and so much more can come a long way. When you listen you know what to do, you can be a good ear for your peers, and it just makes you a good person for taking the time and carefully listening. I feel like I'm always there for people when they need someone to talk to and I can be a really good ear for them.
Chapter 8: Do Something Nice for Someone Else and Don't Tell Anyone About It.
Chapter 8 Question: Recall a time you have given, did you expect acknowledgement?
I try to do things for people not because I want the acknowledgment but because it makes me feel like a good person. Nowadays meeting nice people is very difficult at some times. Not everyone cares about people and not everyone tries to make an effort. I feel like we need more people who are caring and genuine. So I try to be like that. Doing things for people or doing all the work for something and not getting acknowledged can be tough. I know sometimes I get down on myself when I do something for someone and they get the acknowledgment. But you have to realize it doesn't matter what people see and don't see. What matters is how you are as a person and that you are genuine to people. If you are considered a nice person you don't want the acknowledgment. You just like to be nice because it makes you feel like a better person. Treat others the way you want to be treated is by far one of my favorite sayings. I wish everyone could spread positivity and be kind to others. Sadly that's not how life is now. But just because others aren't nice doesn't mean you can't be either. Or just because you don't get acknowledged for being a good person doesn't mean you should stop.
Chapter 9: Let Others Have the Glory
Chapter 9 Question: Have you ever experienced someone else ‘stomping’ on your story (glory)? How did it make you feel?
I would say I am a very considerate person. I always like to listen to everyone else and I will always worry about others before myself. I’ve got use to being the person who cares more or being the person who will listen to everyone else andI would just stay silent. Sometimes I really do wish I wasn't as selfless as I am. Whenever I talk about myself or my accomplishments I feel like they either could care less or maybe they have a bigger accomplishment than me or to me I always think everyone else is more important than myself. But I’ve experienced many times when someone else stomped on my glory. It honestly didn’t make me feel so good. In my head I always think well I never get to talk about my accomplishments or the things I’m proud of and the one time I do someone else tries to take that away. It isn't the greatest feeling when you are very proud of something about yourself and you want to share with others and they just ignore it or think that they are more important than everyone else. As much as it sucks it’s also a life lesson for me because it teaches me how not to act. I don’t want to be that person who always takes away everyone's glory. I know how that feels and I wouldn’t want to make someone else feel the same way.
Chapter 10: Learn to Live in the Present Moment
Chapter 10 Question: What are some ways you learn how to live in the present moment?
I am a person who always worries and stresses about my future. It’s hard for me to stay in the present moment. I always think I need to do this for my future. I need to make sure I have this done or it will ruin my future. Future, future, future. I need to learn how to enjoy life right now while I still have time. I don’t want to regret wasting my teenage years worrying about the future when I can focus on the present. Some ways to live in the present moment is to stop and take time to appreciate what's around you and what you are doing. You also need to get in the mindset of knowing that you only live once and you need to appreciate the time you have. Start enjoying the moments before it’s too late.
Chapter 11: Imagine that Everyone is Enlightened Except you
Chapter 11 Question: Think of a time where you were frustrated, now look at it as a moment of being taught… what'd you learn?
One time I was really frustrated about hearing some people say things about others. I don’t like hearing bad things about people and I feel like our generation doesnt take into consideration that we are all human and we all have feelings. Some people can be so mean. Instead of getting frustrated it taught me how not to act. I want to be a happy nice person to everyone and if others don’t want to do that in return I shouldn’t get mad. It’s not okay but I also can’t control anyone and what they say or do with their life. But I can change myself and my actions. I can be the nice and positive girl I want to be. I don’t have to be like the people who are mean. I also don’t have to be frustrated if that’s how people choose to act.
Chapter 12: Let Others be Right Most of the Time
Chapter 12 Question: Challenge: The next time you are in a discussion/ argument, let the other person be right and take notice on the initial feeling that transpires.
I’ve had many arguments with a lot of different people. And sometimes it’s frustrating letting others be right when I want to consider myself to be right. But with me I just let others be right all the time and I don’t put what I have to say because I feel like arguing just isn’t worth it. I like to make others happy and if that means I don’t say anything and keep my mouth shut that’s what I’ll do. It can be difficult because sometimes I want to say what I have to say but then I just think to myself it’s not worth it. I like to pick and choose my battles. Don’t get me wrong i’ve been getting better at not letting people step all over me. It can be very hard at some times to just stay quiet. But like I said sometimes it’s just not worth it. This week me and my friend were arguing about a topic and I decided to just say yeah you’re right. Even though I didn’t think I was right I knew that if I just told her she was right we could move on and not have to argue about it. It personally made me feel better for just letting her think she was right and moving on with our day. Sometimes you have to be the bigger person and let others be right for once.
Chapter 13: Become more Patient
Chapter 13 Question: Do you ever have a reflection moment when you realize you are very small in this vast world and really your 'drama' isn't that big of a deal?
Patience is one struggle I have. I get frustrated and tend to look at all the negatives in that situation and become angry. Instead if we are more patient and think of the good in the situation you will have a better mindset and things will seem peaceful. We need to stop in the moment and think about how we want to react in the situation. Being patient can be tough especially when you’ve had a long day but don’t let being impatient ruin the rest of your day. I’ve realized that my drama and what I’m mad about in the moment doesn’t really matter nor will it matter the next day. If I just breathe and think about the situation I wouldn’t have to be over dramatic and impatient about the situation. Not everything is a big deal and it doesn’t have to be if you don’t let it.
Chapter 14: Create “Patience, Practice Periods”
Chapter 14 Question: Do you have a "mantra", a statement that you make to yourself daily or weekly?
Sometimes life can get busy, overwhelming, and difficult. Every day I tell myself it’s going to be a good day. Or okay you’re going to be productive,or everything will be okay. Even if it doesn’t feel okay or it doesn’t end well, telling myself that makes me want to wake up and start all over again. Having a good mindset can really change your perspective on a lot of things. When I wake up in the morning and don’t tell myself that it’s harder for me. I’m also not saying that I have a good day everyday or I’m productive everyday but when I set goals for myself or when I push myself to have a good day it really does come a long way.
Chapter 15: Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out
Chapter 15 Question: Have you lost a relationship because something “small” created a “big” divide?
In life I feel like most people lose relationships because they make a problem bigger than what it seems. I’m also one of those people. I can be sensitive and take things bigger than it may be. Who doesn’t? I’ve lost many relationships because of something small. I tend to give people many chances because well life is just too short. But when they keep taking advantage of all the chances you feel like those “small” problems will turn into big problems because you still haven’t let go of all the other mistakes. I have lost a relationship because of something small but that’s because I let people take advantage of those chances.
Chapter 16: Ask Yourself the Question, “Will This Matter a Year from Now?”
Chapter 16 question: What do you hope to do a year from now?
A year from now I will be a sophomore in high school. I’m still so young yet want to accomplish many things. Even if they seem unrealistic I want to work for it. I hope to be president for high school, have a 4.0 gpa or even higher, want to be involved in everything I can, and try to be a normal teenager and have fun. I want to try and live in the present moment and not stress too much. I want to gain friends as well as know my worth and let go of the people who bring me down. I want to be impactful in people's lives and inspire them. There’s a lot I want. I hope those I want become “I did”. I want to work my hardest and make the future I hope to have. Thinking about what I want in a year even if I don’t get to accomplish any of that I still want to better myself and not give up. There’s always going to be a tomorrow.
Chapter 17: Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn’t Fair
Chapter 17 Question: If Life meant to be fair? What does that even mean?
Life isn’t fair. Life isn’t meant to be fair. What does the phrase “life isn’t fair” even mean? It means that life isn’t perfect. Life isn’t like the movies or tv shows. Life is a reality check. Life is hard. Life throws challenges at you. Life isn’t easy even though we wish it was. We tend to throw ourselves a pity party and we make all these excuses for ourselves because “life isn’t fair”. When life is supposed to be hard and not fair. You aren’t always going to get what you want. You aren’t going to be like that other person, you aren’t going to have a perfect life. That’s what makes life worth living. You never know what your day is going to bring, you never know what challenges you are going to face, you’re never going to know what tomorrow will bring. It’s how you want to live and it’s how you act towards life. Life isn’t fair is just another excuse we give ourselves so we don’t have to face reality.
Chapter 18: Allow yourself to be bored
Chapter 18 Question: Do you take time to be bored?
I’m a go go go, person. I always am stressing about something, running around, hanging with friends, and never take the time to sit and be bored. I don’t take time to be bored. I really want to change that. I want to allow myself to take the time to think and have alone time and not worry about everyone else. I have this pressure on myself where I feel the need to take care of others and not myself. If I let myself be bored and have alone time I can find myself and see how self-care is important. I need to learn that it’s okay to be bored.
Chapter 19: Lower your tolerance to stress
Chapter 19 Question: Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing?
I have been taught that stress could be a good thing. Stress always can be motivation. It can make you set goals for yourself and push yourself to the hardest you can. When you are stressed you tend to work yourself up. Sometimes that’s okay. You aren’t going to be stress-free your whole life. It’s good to have stress here and there. It’s a good life lesson and will prepare you for the future.
Chapter 20:
Chapter 20 Question: When is the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone with gratitude
I never realized writing a letter could impact someone in any way. Writing your feelings and showing gratitude to people in your life can make you a better person and make you want to open up about your feelings. Showing gratitude not only makes you feel happy it makes other people feel happy too. Letting them know how you feel about them and expressing how much they mean to you is really important. When you show happy and positive emotions you become more of a happy and positive person. It will make your relationship stronger and you can get closer to them on a personal level. Showing gratitude is something people don’t do often. It’s not a normal thing for us when it really should be. The last time I’ve shown gratitude was when I and the freshmen reps were assigned to write a letter to someone who has impacted you in any way. Then we got a surprise that we had to call the person and read the letter to them. It made me feel really good and I felt happier. Showing gratitude has a big impact on me and my feelings.
Chapter 21:
Chapter 21 Question: If you could change anything right now about your life, what would it be?
I would change my mindset about myself and how I think I need to be perfect. For a long time now I feel like I need to please everyone in order to feel like I do things right. I feel the need to be there for everyone else and I feel like if I dont do things the way others want me to do it I feel like I’ve failed. I want to stop feeling like I need to please everyone all the time and start to be okay with not meeting everyones expectations. It’s hard living with trying to please someone and thinking that if I don’t I’m not good enough. I want to stop thinking that way and realize that I’m in my head and I don’t need to think the way I've been thinking.
Chapter 22:
Chapter 22 Question: Describe a time or moment in your life when you turn something into an emergency.
A moment in my life when I turned something into an emergency was when I was feeling really overwhelmed with everything I was doing in my life and I think my mental and physical health went downhill. I got overstressed and started to freak out and my health started affecting me emotionally and physically. I turned my overthinking and all my activites stressing me out into something that really affected my health. I let myself get in my head when I could have taken a breath and refocus and get back to work. But my body needed the break and I’m slowly figuring out how to better myself.
Chapter 23:
“It puts our quieter, softer, and sometimes most intelligent source of thinking to work for us on issues that we have no immediate answer for.” Sometimes we push things in the back of our mind which is our back burner. We use this when we know we have to do something and when we think of something we push it to the side not because it’s not important but because we don’t have an immediate response for this. I use my backburner a lot for things that are important and I tend to think about other unimportant things while I should be thinking about what I actually have to get done. Instead I push my priorities aside and think about my personal arguments I've had, or setbacks, and I tend to dwell on those instead of doing what I put on my back burner. Sometimes we can’t always find the motivation to do everything we put in our back burner but if we find our purpose and drive and go for what we need to do then we can accomplish our goals. Having a back burner isn’t necessarily a bad thing, just finding the motivation and being able to do your tasks you set aside is what matters.
Chapter 24: Spend a moment Every day thinking of Someone to Thank
Chapter 24 Question: Who is one person you would thank in this moment and why?
One person I would like to thank right now would be my mom. I have put so many taks on her for her to help me get through these tough few weeks that I have and she has done so much for me. I don’t appreciate it as much as I should because I don’t sit down and show gratitude as much as I should. I really do take things for granted and once they are gone or once I'm done being stressed then I think of everything I'm grateful for when I should always feel thankful no matter what I’m going through. We should always be grateful and show gratitude before it’s too late. Instead of looking back on times where we could have been thankful we could start to be thankful for them in the moment and express it. When we have more gratitude in our life we happen to feel better about our days and it makes us feel happier.
Chapter 25: Smile at strangers, Look into their eyes, and say hello
Chapter 25 Questions: Regarding eye contact and connect, what are your initial thoughts?
Eye contact and connecting with strangers can be really important in many aspects. When you are having a bad day one smile and a wave could honestly change how you feel during the rest of your day. You can have different perceptions of people the first time you see them and especially for me I always make sure I smile and wave when I walk by someone because you don’t know what people are going through and one smile can change their whole mood. If you don’t look at them and walk by them and they try to look at you it could make them feel even worse about their day if they just wanted to see a friendly smile to help lighten up their day.
Chapter 26: Set aside quiet time everyday
Chapter 26 Question: When do you find a quiet moment in your day just to present and be quiet? Do you? Or perhaps you don’t explain
I feel like I should work on spending more quiet time alone. I feel like with all my stress and emotions I want to go away spending quality time doing nothing by myself would clear my mind and help me. Whenever I sit down and try to relax I end up just thinking about everything I need to get done so it never turns out well. I need to change my mindset and learn how to get better at spending more time alone. I know I need to start finding a time to start being by myself to take a quiet break doing nothing. The only time I end up not doing anything by myself is when I’m getting ready for bed. I lay down and look up at the ceiling thinking about my day and what I can do to make tomorrow better for me. I feel like we all need to take some time to ourselves before our bodies get tired and shut down. At least for me I’m always go go go and never take a break and settle down which gets my body worked up. I’m going to find a time to do something by myself to just be present and quiet.
Chapter 27: Imagine the people in your life as tiny infants and as 100 year old adults
Chapter 27 Question: Describe a time when you have been frustrated with someone but you let go of the situation and moved forward with life. How did that make you feel?
At times I was frustrated with someone. I tell myself to let go of the situation but deep down I still hold onto the situation. It takes me a long time when something happens that hurts me or affects me in any way to get over it. I wish I could just forgive and forget but it’s easier said than done. But once I let go of the situation then I feel like a weight on my shoulders has been lifted. Once I let go of the situation I can be happier again and not think about it twenty four seven. Letting go of a situation can be hard though but once you realize that there are so many things you are going to go through in life and if you learn how to move on earlier it will be easier for you to feel better about situations later on. At first when a situation happens I feel really vulnerable and upset about it but once I realize that this is going to hurt right now but I’m not going to remember it in 5 years so why stress on it right now? You only live once so live with happiness and kindness in your heart and you will feel better about situations.
Chapter 28: Seek first to understand
Chapter 28 Question: Describe a situation where you didn’t seek to understand first. Was there resolution with this conflict?
A situation where I didn’t seek to understand first would be when I got into an argument with my parents. Sometimes I just get so frustrated that everything they say I assume is wrong because I don’t always want their opinion I sometimes just want them to listen. So instead of trying to seek to understand before I get upset I just lash out at them and not try to listen. With doing that we all just get mad at each other and end up fighting which doesn’t solve the problem it just makes it worse. I realized if I just try to understand first it will avoid getting into an argument and having them mad at me.
Chapter 29: Become a better listener
Chapter 29 Question: Who is someone that you can genuinely talk to that you know will listen to you. Describe this relationship.
One person I could genuinely talk to that will listen to me would be my best friend. He is always willing to listen to my rants, my problems, all my random thoughts, and opinions even if he doesn’t want to. Sometimes he doesn’t understand and it makes me upset but I have to realize that at least I have someone who is willing to listen to me no matter what. Our relationship is very healthy because we both are similar but have our different opinions and we both care about each other and both of our feelings. I feel like you can’t really talk to someone that will genuinely listen to you if they don’t necessarily care about you because then they can just zone out. It’s something really special to have someone who listens to you.
Chapter 30: Choose your battles wisely
Chapter 30 Question: Describe a time where you lost your shh and in reality it wasn’t worth your energy. How did you feel after this confrontation? Could it have gone differently if you didn’t sweat the small stuff?
A time where I lost my shh was when I was trying to tell my friend how I’ve been feeling during our friendship and she went off on me flipping it around on me and named everything off that I’ve done wrong. At the moment I was so upset because I wanted to just tell her how I’ve been feeling about us but she went off on me and lashed out so I got frustrated and instead of choosing my battles and leaving it alone I just wasted my energy arguing with someone who I felt like the connection was lost. I always try to be the bigger person and I’m usually good at choosing my battles but it’s hard for me because I always hold in my emotions until I just lash out. If I didn’t sweat the small stuff she was saying about me I could have just chosen not to fight this battle and leave it alone but I didn’t.
Chapter 31: Become aware of your moods and don’t allow yourself to be fooled by the low ones
Chapter 31 Question: Explain a time when you were in a bad mood and how it shaped your day. Describe a time you were in a great mood and it shaped your day.
We are all human and we all have bad days. For me I’ve been feeling like I’ve been in a bad mood more than I wish to be. I let my emotions control my moods and it ruins my whole entire day. If I’m in a bad mood then it makes me upset, sad, and makes me want to just go home and cry. It brings my whole day down because of a mood I’m letting affect my feelings. But when I’m in a good mood it makes my whole day feel good. When I’m positive and happy it makes me energetic and smiling all day. I feel like depending on my mood depends on what everyone around me is acting like, or what is going on in my mind. If they are in bad moods then I’m in a bad mood. That saying “you are who you hang out with” really is true. If you surround yourself with positive and happy people then you will become a happier person. But if you’re around people who are always negative and down on themselves then you will feel the same. We all have our days but I want to learn how to not let my bad moods affect my whole day.
Chapter 32: Life is a test. It is only a test
Chapter 32 Question: As an experiment, see if you can apply this idea to something you are forced to deal with right now. Explain your emotions and logic behind the situation. Can you rise above it?
When I’m upset or having a bad day my mind doesn’t go to “life is a test” my mind goes somewhere different. Maybe it’s because of my precipitation of things and how I think of everything but I don’t feel like life is a test. You can change your mindset and make you think life is a test but in reality I feel like life is always about you and your choices, and actions you convey in life. It’s not about life testing you and it’s not whatever happens happens, it’s all about your mindset and attitude towards your life and what you do with everything. Everyone handles life differently and we all think differently and even handle our emotions differently. That’s what makes it hard to get into an argument with someone because we all think and react in different ways so it can cause some collison towards one another if you guys can’t agree on something. I can rise above my emotions without thinking about it as a test. I think my emotions are what I feel and I need to communicate or try to find a solution so I can stop feeling the way I was feeling. At the end of the day I feel like you are the only person who reacts or thinks of how you want your life to be.
Chapter 33: Praise and blame are all the same
Chapter 33 Question: You will not please everyone. How does this statement sit with you and why do we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive?
In my life I’ve always been a people pleaser and now that I’m looking at it all it does is mentally destroy me in a way. Being a people pleaser I put everyone above myself and I put their feelings above mine which isn’t always good because it doesn’t make me feel any better. I hate when people judge me or don’t like me when all I do is try to mind my business and be nice to everyone. What I’ve come to realize is that not everyone is going to like you and everyone is always going to have a bad opinion on you and you can’t change that. I want to accept the fact that everyone is going to judge and not everyone is going to like you and sometimes I need to put myself first. It hurts when you do so much for the approval of other people just for them to go behind your back and end up not liking you. Being a people pleaser shouldn’t determine who you are as a person. I’ve learned a lot on how it affects me and what it does when you try so hard to please everyone.
Chapter 34: Practice random acts of kindness
Chapter 34 Question: Describe a time you completed RAK and how did it make you feel?
I try to go out of my way to always do a random act of kindness. Everyone over-thinks this too much. It is a simple task that goes a long way. Simply saying hi and smiling at someone can impact a whole person's mood. For example when I open a door for people and they don’t say thank you it makes me upset. But when other people say thank you and they appreciate it, it will make you feel like you did something good for someone as well as making the other person appreciate you for having someone do something for you. A random act of kindness makes me feel like I’m trying to go out of my way just to make sure I’m being a decent human being and when other people appreciate you for your actions then you will be able to make your mood change. Random acts of kindness takes two seconds while being able to make your day even better.
Chapter 39: Practice Humility
Chapter 39 Question: Describe a time when you saw an individual or a group lack humility. How did that make you feel about said individual/group? No need to share names in this example.
A time when I saw a lack of humility within a person is when they think they aren’t the problem and they blame everything on someone else. It’s hard to get into a fight with someone who can’t see where you are coming from and it’s very one sided. It makes me upset when I am arguing with someone and I'm trying to explain how I'm feeling and they don’t even care and they just say well it’s your fault. In arguments I wish it can be both of us and we both can see what we did wrong. It just shows they don’t own up or take accountability for their actions which simplifies the lack of humility because it just shows they only care about themselves. It made me feel upset and angry towards the person because I don’t like being understanding and considerate to people who don’t do that for me. I feel like I'm more mature than most people in my grade that I talk to, so sometimes things make me upset that wouldn’t make anyone else upset.
Chapter 40: When in Doubt about Whose Turn It Is to Take out the Trash, Go Ahead and Take it Out Chapter 40 Question: What is your perspective/opinion of this article? Valid or a waste of time?
I do agree with this opinion of the article because taking the time to point out the tiniest things can honestly be so tiring. It can be extremely annoying and I don’t understand why people have to get mad or talk about something that is so small that doesn’t have an impact on them in any way. I have to realize that I can’t always be right as much as I want to. My mom gets mad at me over the littlest things and I try to ignore it but sometimes it gets the best of me and I need to realize it shouldn’t matter and it’s okay to forget to do something sometimes you shouldn’t bring yourself down over it. At the end of the day we are human and we shouldn’t “Sweat the small stuff”.
Chapter 41: Avoid Weatherproofing
Chapter 41 Question: Are you weatherproof? Explain.
I feel like i don’t weatherproof as most people because I've been through a lot of hard times in my life that made me open my eyes to different perspectives and made me realize everyone has feelings and everyone is going through something. I put myself in peoples shoes and realize that no one is perfect even if they think they are, or you think they are. Everyone has their flaws and sometimes people aren’t going to do or give what you want or need in life and we shouldn’t point it out all the time and get mad over things and people’s actions that we can’t control. I’m trying to learn how to not rely or get upset at people and have high expectations because at the end of the day the only thing i can control is myself and my actions. It’s something I'm trying to get better at because I can be judgy and have high expectations for some people in my life, especially myself.
Chapter 42- Spend a moment, everyday, thinking of someone to love
Chapter 42 Question- Who do you choose to send love to at this moment?
I choose to send my dad love at this moment because I don’t really spend as much time with him as I used to and I hope he never forgets how much our relationship truly means to me. He is always there for me and does everything that I ask him to do for me. He always makes sure I’m doing okay and never fails to make me laugh. I have always been a daddy’s girl and even though I’m growing up I still always will be. I feel like once I got a boyfriend I don’t hangout with my dad like I used to. So I hope he still knows I love him and he will always be my best friend. He not only does everything for me he does for my mom, and brothers. He works very hard for us and even though he doesn’t always like spending money, or doing things I want to do, he still always does it to make us happy. He goes above and beyond for my little brother and it makes me happy to see that. He is an amazing day and I hope he truly knows that.
Chapter 43- Become an Anthropologist
Chapter 43 Question- Reflect on the following Judging others takes a great deal of energy, and without expectation, pulls you away from where you want to be.
We all can admit that we see ourselves judging others. Not because we want to bring people down but because we are always going to have a different opinion on people which makes us all different. There is a difference between judging and bringing someone down. Everyone has their own true definition of what they think about judgment but at the end of the day being rude and talking about others and just bringing them down is a waste of your energy. Why do we feel the need to say the things we say about some people when we don’t want others judging ourselves? It’s a hard concept when you think about it but at the end of the day if we don’t want others to bring us down and judge us then we shouldn’t do it either. It’s much harder being a mean person than it is to be nice or not even say anything at all. When you want to be a nice person and you don’t want to bring people down, if all you do is judge someone then you aren’t being who you truly want to be.
Chapter 44- Understand Separate Realities
Chapter 44 Question- Why is it important to see the differences in one another in our small intimate circle to cultures around the world?
It’s important to see different views and perspectives on things because at the end of the day if we were all the same then we would be living in a whole different world. Being different is good. Why would you want to have a million of the same you? I know I wouldn’t. We find our people who we know we will get along with and sometimes they can be the complete opposite of who you are but you get along because you both can share your differences and learn. I know me and my boyfriend have a lot of similarities which makes us have things in common but we also act and think differently which balances each other out. You need someone who will give you what you don’t have in your personality. Having someone different than you can make you look in a different view you wouldn’t have if you were the same person.
Chapter 45- Developing your own Helping Rituals
Chapter 45 Question: What are some ways you can help the spread of kindness towards others?
Sometimes all it takes is a simple compliment to help and bring joy to someones day. Life can be hard and sometimes it can be a simple "you look great today" to bring a smile to someones face. I can help bring kindness towards others by complimenting, simply asking if someone needs help with something I will go out of my way to help them, or even picking up their slack. If you see someone is struggling you can go up to them and make them feel better about themselves. It doesn't take a long task to bring joy into someones life. We should try to bring more acts of kindness because it makes me a happier person in general. When you are kind to someone it will make you feel like a better person. We all need to get in a habit to make someones day because it will make out society better if we all contribute in a way.
Chapter 46: Everyday tell at least One person something you like, Admire or appreciate about them
Chapter 46 Question: Give someone a compliment via text message or DM. Who did you choose and how did it make you feel to support another person?
I gave my younger brother Ayden a compliment on text since he is out of town at a football tournament. He is one of the most passionate and dedicated boy to sports that I know. He is on two teams and when he doesn't have practice he goes and finds trainings to go to so he can get better. He is only 12 years old and he is so incredibly talented. He is going to go so far in life and I wanted him to know that I am so proud of him and want him to know that I will always be cheering him on even if I can't make it to most of his games. It made me feel better about our relationship because being five years apart can be hard but we are really close and I want him to know I love him. Siblings are hard especially since he is a young boy who doesn't like emotions. I am the complete opposite.. but he secretly cares and it makes me happy that he knows I love and care about him.
Chapter 47: Argue your limitations, and They’re yours
Chapter 47 Question: Discuss a time where you had self doubt and set limitations on yourself. How did you change this behavior?
I am struggling with self doubt right as I'm typing this. I recently just lost something I have worked so hard for and have been wanting since I was a freshman. I am doubting who I am as a person, pondering if I'm good enough, asking myself what could I have done to win, and overall bringing myself down. The sad thing is I'm not mad that I lost. I'm mad at how I've been treated during it. I am mad that I am such a good person and don't try to ruin people just because they try to ruin me. I set limitations on sticking up for myself and just trying to figure it out on my own. But I need to realize enough is enough and I'm not going to let these people keep winning. It's time for a change and I am going to fight for myself. I'm done holding myself back because I'm so kind and selfless. I am tired of beating myself up because no one believes in me. I am going to fight for what is right because we are leaders and this is what we do.